If you still hold onto the stereotype that the Japanese are uptight, keep reading.
“Erotica will Save the World” seems to me like the coolest idea in fundraising since good causes dragged their needy asses along. And speaking about needs, there will always be lame folks with the will to buy their erotic thrills, so why not put their lust into funding for breast cancer research or campaigns for safer sex?
Sure, this argument sounds awfully similar to the one made in favour of prostitution, but this is not what I’m saying. This is all about empowerment. Well, maybe not all about empowerment, perhaps a bit of misogyny and consumerism of the dismembered female form, but let’s not go there.
OK, I’ll explain. This past weekend in Tokyo, there was a 24-hour erotic marathon of activities all arranged for charity. There were the usual sexy attractions: erotica and porn on sale; there was the masturbation marathon (maybe not usual in your Bible Belt county fair, but its the kind of activity that keeps coming up, if you’ll excuse the pun). The event that no-one could ignore was Oppai Momi.
Sure, Oppai Momi in its original form is just a cheap and straight-to-the-point version of the Japanese hostesses. Available at local bars, it means you pay your yens and club a feel of the waitress.
The attraction at this particular event, though, was the same grabbing of breasts for pay, but the lovely women were volunteering their flesh in the service of a collection for an AIDS organization, STOP!AIDS.
This may seem out of character but the systematic way that these women were fondled was nothing if not Japanese.
Here are the rules:
- 1. Line up, have your ID checked (must be over 18)
- 2. Donate money
- 3. Sterilize your hands
- 4. Squeeze breasts (up to two squeezes per hand)
I rest my case.