What Makes Chocolate the Perfect Lover?

Chocolate is our friend, our comforter and in many ways, our sensual and romantic collaborator.

Chocolate, or an earlier version of it, came to us (like tobacco, indigo and potatoes) from the pre-colonial Americas. They provided the cocoa beans, someone added the butter and sugar plus flavours from every corner; the result of this global effort is the most sensual and adored treat of them all.

Even in its early days, its pleasure was so obvious that it tortured the pious establishment. When chocolate was first brought to Europe, the heads of the Spanish church tried to distance their followers from this naughty foodstuff, calling it “immoral and provocative”.

And then there is the mystical relationship between chocolate and love, chocolate and passion, chocolate and sex. It starts with using chocolate as the aphrodisiac, the magic ingredient to cook up the sex, and it goes on to comparing the pleasure of chocolate to that of an orgasm, and inevitably follows the idea that chocolate can function as a replacement for sex.

Over the years chocolate has had great marketing and merchandising. It’s starred with all the coolest celebrities in all the trendiest places, but it is not just about image and good times. It is about having real chemical properties that affect our health and our pleasure centre.

And this is how it works:

  •  Sugar gives us a quick, accessible form of energy, a type of high
  •  Caffeine is a stimulant which provides an easy buzz and provides relief for people dependent on its awakening power
  •  Anandamides create a response in the brain to THC, the same response caused by marijuana
  •  Antioxidants protect our cells from cell damage which can lead to cancer, heart disease and other diseases
  •  Stearic Acid is a fat that does not increase blood cholesterol levels

Of course it’s chocolate’s versatility that makes it our favourite over the counter drug. There are so many ways of getting a hit and very few of them are against the law. Of course the law of gravity may work against you if you overdo the habit, so try to connect chocolate with aerobic workouts as often as possible.

Here are just a few suggestions:

1. Finish a meal with hot chocolate dessert followed by sweltering sex

2. Follow the sex with chocolate ice-cream in bed

3. Eat chocolate spread off each others’ bodies during sex. Keep it out of the vagina, though. The sugar is bound to mess with the bacterial balance and lead to yeast infections or other not-so-sweet outcomes.

You can use chocolate in its natural form, allowing the natural heat of the body to to melt it; but if the only thing that’s having a melt down is your will power, you can buy chocolate body paint

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