Now There are Demisexuals Too

In a world that loves putting people in boxes, the newest definition on the sexual spectrum is Demisexual. For those who do not update their sexual jargon regularly, this refers to a breakaway from the asexuals. This group consists of people who experience feeling no sexual attraction to other people, until such time as a profound emotional or romantic relationship develops between them. This differs from the former group in that asexuals can fall in love, marry, care deeply and feel romantic connections, but do not feel sexual feelings to others.

While some people need to subdivide people into seemingly endless groups based on a certain aspect of their behaviour, others see the human condition as a continuum of diverse possibilities. People who define themselves as demisexual may be seeking a category to fall into so that they can be comfortably within some norm, whereas regarding themselves as asexual except under certain (strict) conditions feels like betrayal.

If we consider asexuality as a tendency and not an unshakable state of being, or perhaps believing that all sexuality is at the least slightly fluid, then this new group might find that it has no need to struggle for recognition. Maybe what we need more than yet another sexual type, is to cease being bothered by peoples’ sexual idiosyncrasies. Because in sex as in sex, very little makes sense entirely. And it should not have to.

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