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The Vestibulitis Diary – Part 7: Hysteria

4 Days Before Surgery The women who suffer from VVS but have no diagnosis are stuck in tough position. For the longest time I just felt like there was something wrong, but I was not always comfortable saying “no, not tonight”. Part of the reason was that I would take a month off intimacy here and there trying to see if I had just injured myself and the tissues needed to heal. Curiosity and hope would... read more

The Vestibulitis Diary – Part 6: The Death of Sexy

5 Days Before Surgery Before VVS, I was a very sexual person. Sex was both love and art. I was keyed into some of the deepest parts of my soul through sex. I found myself through experimentation. I exorcised demons. I orchestrated long nights of intense pleasure with the skill of a courtesan. I loved and was loved, accidentally broke hearts and had mine broken as well. I enjoyed being desired, I enjoyed... read more

The Vestibulitis Diary – Part 5: Physical Therapy

6 Days Before Surgery For the vestibulitis (VVS) I spent a little over a year in physical therapy. There is a theory that for VVS to clear, the tension needs to be relieved in the pelvic floor. Tension from the muscles, tension from the fascia, etc. The tension could come from a mis-aligned pelvis, so my physical therapist designed a therapeutic regimen to relieve tension, balance the pelvis, and lesson... read more

The Vestibutitis Diary – Part 4: Tools of the Trade

6 Days Before Surgery Been there, done that, bought that, tried that. The things I have acquired in the pursuit of self-healing. I don’t even want to break down the prices of things, the co-pays alone would probably piss me off to think about. Some things were helpful, a lot of the PT exercises will be beneficial for the rest of my life. (In general… it’s nice to stretch). Other things were quackery, the... read more

The Vestibulitis Diary – Part 3: Sadness

8 Days Before Surgery   Over two years ago I acquired VVS [Vulvar Vestibulitis Syndrome]. Though I didn’t know I had it until I ended up self-diagnosing one night at 3 in the morning, madly typing symptoms into Google. It has been two years of feeling like I am burning inside, feeling raw, red hot, excruciatingly sensitive. It makes certain movements painful, certain items of clothing, certain actions.... read more

The Vestibulitis Diary – Part 2: Authorization

21 Days Before Surgery Apparently, I said the right word (Lawyer), or talked to the right people (my HR dept) bitching about my wrongful denial. Either way, my insurance company called me today to tell me that even though they denied my appeal, they are approving the authorization for the procedure. Strangeness. How many fates turn around in the overtime? I am still waiting for them to pull the rug out... read more

The Vestibutitis Diary – Part 1: Devastated

22 Days Before Surgery I have had a chronic pain condition for about two years. I have put in a lot of time and effort into healing myself and taking care. I have literally changed my life because of it. Basically, I am at a point where I need a simple surgery to remove a reactive piece of tissue. I was scheduled for a surgery in July which got pushed back to August. The day before my surgery was... read more


Polygyny is the main form of polygamy, when one man is married to several women at one time. This doesn’t involve a strict definition of marriage, it could involve being legally married to only one woman, but living together, as spouses, with that woman as well as others. In countries where polygamy is against the law, communities that practice it manage to do so by either not formally marrying additional... read more

Bette Davis Eyes

Kim Carnes (1981)   Lyrics by Donna Weiss and Jackie DeShannon   Her hair is Harlowe gold Her lips sweet surprise Her hands are never cold She’s got Bette Davis eyes She’ll turn her music on you You won’t have to think twice She’s pure as New York snow She got Bette Davis eyes   And she’ll tease you She’ll unease you All the better just to please you... read more

What Can be Done about Vestibulitis?

When a woman has a lighter case of vestibulitis, cream can be prescribed and applied topically. This simply reduces the general sensitivity around the vestibular area. Steroid creams such as zinc oxide creams sometimes clear up the symptoms wouldn’t necessarily cure the problem at the root. For a more severe case, there is a medication called amitriptyline, which works by adjusting the... read more

What is Vestibulitis?

Vestibulitis, or Vulvar Vestibulitis Syndrome (VVS), is a condition in which pain is felt in the vestibular area, which is the few centimetres surrounding the vaginal entrance.   The Vulva with the vestibule highlighted in yellow The pain is caused by extra sensitivity of this generally extremely sensitive area. Whereas usually, a woman will feel pleasure when this area is gently touched, a woman... read more

Venereal Disease

Venereal Disease (VD) was the term commonly used in the past for Sexually Transmitted Diseases or Infections (STDs or STIs), especially syphilis and gonorrhea. Some say that the word venereal comes from Venus, the Roman goddess of love, and that is why STDs were also nicknamed Venus’ Curse. This is partially correct; venereal comes from the Latin ‘venereus’ meaning of sexual love which is taken from that... read more

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