Ask Dinah your question

i had been with a guy for more than a year but we never had penetrative sex. my question is can i contract hiv from having contact with the penis and vagina without penetration?? what are the risks?

Dinah answers: The risks of non-penetrative sex are obviously lower than penetrative sex, in fact without daring to use numbers it is safe to say that chances are low, but nobody can promise you that those chances of zero. When there is any genital contact there is bound to be some body fluids moving from one person to another and HIV is carried in both vaginal fluid and semen (as well as pre-cum). It is true that an HIV carrier’s sexual fluids cannot enter your bloodstream without entering some break in the skin or membrane, but you can never know if you have tiny cuts in the vulva area, or for that matter in the mouth, through which research has shown HIV can be spread. While non-penetration is endlessly safer than all forms of penetration, it is worthwhile to both get tested before you have contact with his semen if you’d like to be safe and to assure one another that you have done everything you can to protect yourselves.

Can you get an std from giving a guy a handjob. He did cum, I was rubbing my clit but none of the sperm on me n I did not finger myself, just rubbing. My other partner is now complaining of burning while peeing. Its been a week since it happend.??? Help

Dinah answers: You seem to have understood the principle: if you got any semen or pre-cum on your hand and then touched yourself – internally or externally – you can infect yourself. You may not have noticed him touching you with a wet hand or you rolling over onto a wet spot. This is not the most effective way to get infected, but it is certainly possible. Instead of considering the chances, you should get yourself checked out at a local doctor or family planning clinic. There is a chance that you have picked up something and can spread it without feeling any symptoms yourself. While most infections take longer than a few days to show up (and certainly to infect a second person), it is quite likely to have picked up something in the past if you and maybe also your partners have more than one partner.

i had oral sex with a prostitute. she put a condom on my penis. she also licked my testicles with her mouth. after i ejaculated she removed my condom but i did not wash either the penis or the testicles. i am worried will i get any std or sti from the saliva on my testicles if mixed with the sperms on my penis...

Dinah answers: It is very unlikely that you would be infected by her saliva, especially if she did not put her mouth directly around your penis, but there is an extremely small chance of contracting an STI such as gonorrhea, which can be carried in the throat as well as the genitals. The problem is not if anything touched the semen that had already been ejaculated, but rather if the saliva had direct contact with any part of your genitals that had a sore or cut, even a tiny one, through which viruses, bacteria or parasites can enter.

Recently, I develop rashes on my arm, leg and near the rib area. The rashes look like HIVES rashes or mosquito bite. I am worried because a years ago, I receive a blow job from a women since then, i being looking for HIV and STD symptom. I did not have any symptom related to HIV/STD, but can HIV person still develop rashes? Is that true? What should I do?

Dinah answers: With HIV it takes many years before you start experiencing symptoms. The only way to know early on is to take a blood test at an HIV testing centre. Other STIs may show symptoms almost immediately, or they could take years to develop. But the rash that you have described is not typically related to a disease that you have gotten sexually. You probably need to show your family doctor so that they can diagnose it and give you the appropriate treatment. If you received a blowjob from someone and you have the feeling that she had any STI, you must get tested. From now on use a condom with all acts of sex, and don’t assume that you can see signs of HIV or other STIs, on yourself or on others.

If a man has thick semen, is he infected? Can i get an infection from a blowjob if his semen is thick?

Dinah answers: You can get infected from a blowjob with any semen, thick or thin, frothy or smooth, tasty or bitter. Don’t make the mistake of having unsafe sex and then looking for clues to what risk you’ve put yourself at. Most infections are past on without providing the carriers with any signs. You can assume that you are at risk of having been affected, so you should get yourself tested for as many STIs as your local clinic can check. In future, use a condom, even when for oral sex, until you know that you are both clean.

my girlfriend and i was having sex. i came, and after right as i was coming, she started to come. so continued to ride her. after we had sex, i took off the condom and saw clear, silky, white fluid around the base of my shaft. when i told my gf to check and see if she had any on her she said it was probably her ovulation fluid. i feel like after i came and we continued to have sex for about 10 seconds, the cum might have escaped from the condom and into my pubic area. could the cum have transferred from my pubic area and into her? What does ovulation fluid look like so i can distinguish between my cum and her fluids. please help!

Dinah answers: There term “ovulation fluid” is not quite accurate. During the time around ovulation, a woman’s cervical mucus tends to get sticky and slightly thicker, but it is not quit milky white. It is more likely that what you have described is the milky discharge caused by a yeast infection (not an STD), but it is worthwhile checking out to make sure that she doesn’t have some form of STD. There is of course the possibility that there was leakage from the condom, depending on how quickly your erection went down afterwards. You are supposed to remove the condom soon after ejaculating, before you go soft. Condoms are stretchy so they don’t leak until you lose a significant part of the volume of your erection, but make sure in future that you don’t wait too long, or you run the risk of unplanned pregnancy and STDs.